𝙳𝚒𝚖𝚊 𝚂𝚔𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚜𝚑 @skavish@welley.social
i just wanted to sign my windows app. that's it. that was the whole plan.
yesterday i tried to sign up for azure for the first time in my life. nothing worked. i decided microsoft is so broken you can't even give them money. turns out there was a microsoft outage. nobody told me, of course.
today sign-up worked, so i went looking for the code signing service. couldn't find it. it used to be called trusted signing, now it's artifact signing, and before you can use it you have to register a "resource provider" in your subscription. sure. obviously.
next step: "identity validation". fine. i fill in the company details. they show me a qr code for microsoft authenticator. i scan it.
"you don't have any usable ids."
turns out that qr code is for showing your id, not getting one. to get one you go to a third-party site:
- enter your email
- enter the pin they send you
- enter your phone number
- scan another qr code with your phone camera
- photograph your passport
- take a selfie
- open authenticator and scan a third qr code to add the id
- scan a fourth qr code to share it
and then face check failed. the camera did not recognize my face. my own face.
the official fix: delete the request, delete the id, start again from the beginning.
and if it works, microsoft then reviews the company for 1 to 20 business days.
all this so windows stops telling people my app might be dangerous.
the more trillions they have the more crappy the software becomes